Selfcare. This buzzword has attached itself to everything from yoga to gut-health to circadian rhythm and isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. It’s #goals, #feels, and #vibes all wrapped into one. It’s the epicenter of SkinOwl, wherein taking care of your skin can be the catalyst to taking care of yourself on a greater, more impactful level. So why, when my world gets busy, is selfcare the first thing to go out the door? In my experience, I’ve learned that selfcare is most certainly a practice vs a destination. It will always be something I have to work on, a muscle that will constantly need to be honed.
John Lennon once said, “Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” I’m gonna go ahead and piggy-back that and say, “Selfcare is what happens while you’re busy focusing on selfcare.” I find it’s quite easy to let my busy schedule, dog, work goals, monthly cycle, even vacations throw me off. Of course, so much of this is life. If you pick up and go to New York or go an hour outside of where you live, it’s unfair to think the commute, the time difference, and your schedule won’t force you to click reset on some level when you return. For me, selfcare is more about getting back on the horse and doing my very best to pick up the pieces of my life that are important to me, i.e getting in a good sweat, stepping away from my work day and going for a walk, setting aside time for pamper (one girl’s handbag is another girl’s brow wax), and using products on myself, my house and my clients that promote health and care. It’s these things that preserve me in life and act as my go-to “feel goods.”
The point of this blog is not to talk about my positive relationship with selfcare these days. It’s to open up about how selfcare once left me, in a word, self-scared. Before I owned a skincare company, I notoriously had jobs that had me traveling A LOT. By car, by train, by plane. I was on the road and rarely stopped long enough to really get into a routine at home in Los Angeles. I was going out with my friends a ton. I was uber-available. Always up-to-date on everyone’s “situation.” I felt a sense of worth when people needed me – for advice, for a night out, for really anything. I was a serial “over-compensator” and for many years, it “worked” for me. Over time, and with age, these default behaviors started to morph into practices of selfcare. Staying out late turned into waking up early to get in a workout. I got into yoga. I bought a juicer. I went to see a myriad of specialists and naturopaths to learn more about my body. I went gluten-free. I stopped eating dairy. I chucked anything that was “toxic.” Living in LA didn’t help, as you can imagine, mostly as someone who works in the wellness industry. It started to feel like, at the ripe age of 35, that everywhere I turned, people were talking about their diet, their ailments, and all of the many things holding them back from their best life. And I was all in. On the surface, it felt like I was taking care of myself and an active participant in the game of life and health. Everywhere I looked, be it on Instagram or on a TV commercial, the message was, “If you do “x”, you will be happier/healthier/live longer/have less gastro issues/get pregnant finally, and the list goes on…
And while I feel great after a No. 8 at Juice Served Here, I felt like something was missing. Workout. Check. No gluten. Check. Toxin-free household. Check. So why wasn’t I feeling present? Why wasn’t I happy? And then it hit me. Literally like a ton of bricks. For me, selfcare is the act of caring for myself alongside giving myself a break. Otherwise, innocence feels lost and sometimes it feels like crap when I’m overly aware. I want to be the girl who asks for bread at a restaurant and not have it feel wrong (note: I’ve never tested positive for a gluten allergy or celiacs). I want to eat my Mom’s spaghetti with parmesan sprinkled on top, because it reminds me of my childhood. I want to have one too many glasses of wine in Italy. I want to skip a day at the gym if I’m feeling tired, so I can replenish myself wholeheartedly. In sum, I don’t want to feel trapped by the things that make me feel alive. In life, there are experiences that matter more than the fear of what it will do to me.
“Where skincare becomes selfcare” never rang truer as a brand slogan, as it recognizes a moment in your life where you have a choice. It’s not asking for every moment. It’s asking you to consider one avenue, i.e. a skincare routine. In the end, you might find life is best spent with a Beauty Drops in your right hand and your Mom’s spaghetti in the left. In the end, selfcare is about dialing into yourself and finding that sweet spot. A place where you can just be. Where you can care for yourself alongside forgiving yourself. Where selfcare never has to feel punishing. To me, this is happiness. This is #goals. This is “making it” in LA. :)